Sunday, 3 March 2013

My weekend

It's been an interesting weekend..! Mostly it was really nice and relaxing, and it was lovely to see my family again.
My diagnosis anniversary on Friday was actually fine in the end- my dog gave me lots of cuddles and made me smile and laugh so there were no tears :)
I've played a lot of music whilst I've been home which has been really therapeutic. I'd forgotten how nice it is to just get lost in music and forget about everything. My arms are now rather sore but definitely worth it..!
Had a bit of a nightmare on Saturday but I'm already finding it quite funny looking back. I went into town to do a bit of shopping with my mum and brother and came over not feeling well. To cut a long story short I ended up lying on the floor of the shopping centre.. A lovely security guy came and there were lots of offers from strangers to help/ring an ambulance etc (which I obviously refused). After a lie down (in the main stretch of the shopping centre- not in the way at all..), once I was well enough to sit up, I got helped into a shop for a sit down and they got my mum to collect me from the loading bay and I was helped out to the car. Safe to say our nice shopping trip didn't go quite as planned..! Really heartening how lovely everyone is when something like that happens though- lots of complete strangers offered to help :) (Apparently one of the people I turned help away from was a nice looking doctor- should have let him help after all ;) haha). Certainly wouldn't recommend a shopping centre floor in terms of somewhere for a comfy lie down by the way..! Need to be slightly more mindful of my limits in future.. It's easy to wrongly think you're well enough to do something that you're not- particularly when your symptoms are in a phase of keeping you guessing somewhat- which at the moment mine most certainly are. And it's particularly easy to be overly optimistic when you're in a good mood, which I now am again, at last.
It actually feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders now that my diagnosis anniversary has passed, which is all a bit stupid really.
Even though things clearly didn't go completely to plan over the weekend and I'm obviously disappointed that my limits are currently lower than I had thought, I feel much stronger emotionally than I have in a while.
Physically on the other hand, I don't feel great. Once again eating is causing a problem and with my weight being so low it's a bit tricky when your body is trying to reject food. I'm feeling pretty weak, and my face sensations are just not stopping at all. I'm not actually feeling as exhausted as I would expect though given that my body clearly isn't too happy at the moment, so I'm really grateful about that :)

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